I
stepped out of my car at the grocery store today and heard music. I
thought maybe for Christmas they were pumping it outside, but it was
live. Looking over, I could see the source of it was a puffy-coated
woman playing a violin that was filling the air with ethereal music, not
often heard in such a spot. Straining
to read the sign she’d propped up behind her, I was overcome with
emotion making out the words ‘rent’ and ‘kids’ and ‘need help.’ Tears
leaked down my face while walking into the store, and I vowed to give
her ten bucks when I got back outside. Walking
through the store, sadness came flooding in that anyone would have to
do that to make ends meet, and then I got angry at the why of it. Sad
won over, and ten didn’t seem enough. After checking out with my one
bag, I put it in the car and got a 20 from my wallet. I only had that 20
because of the kindness and generosity of others…and I was literally
compelled to pay it forward. Tears
leaked out again on the way over to where she was playing, and when I
put the bill in her case (there were only two singles there already),
our eyes met with an unspoken understanding. She nodded, playing the
whole time…and I turned to go, catching my breath on the way back to the
car. Why so upset? Emotions shifted rapidly from sad to angry to
grateful and then back through the cycle again. Are
we to be grateful for the experience of suffering? If I rail against
the fact that humans the world over have been put through the ringer in
too many ways, literally, to count…what help does that do? Surely, it
serves as a release to feel those feelings and then let them go. Emotion
is one of our greatest powers, and correspondingly, a great
vulnerability. What
to do with all the sadness? That’s a toughie. As compassionate beings,
I’m not sure there’s a bypass for that one, but we don’t have to swim in
the sad pool for very long, either. The view from altitude is looking
very promising about now, and in my heart, all the parking lot musicians
of the world will soon have what they need, as we all will. Focus on the good, true and beautiful helps to bring exactly all of that to fruition. The
one feeling I’ll hold onto of the three is gratitude. Sometimes, it can
feel as though only a few unfortunate events could leave any one of us
in such a position. Sincere appreciation for what we do have truly opens
the door for more such blessings to grace our lives. May we all soon be free of the Matrix, including the one that lives only in the mind… |
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